Five. Boys.

I hate myself today.... I hate the person I’ve been. I have tried to check myself and make myself get out of this funk, but I just seemed to sink right back in.  I got to sleep in, so it’s not from being tired. I got to bath. Alone. And wash my hair AND shave my legs. I got to relax while the babies took a nap, and the older kids kept quietly to themselves in the Rec room. I got to fix my hair. I barely had to cook. So why, why, why, was I such a Bitch today? Why was I so mean? So defensive? So short, and nasty? Now that the day is done, I hate myself. I hated myself a few different times today, but right now, I really hate myself.  I got mad when the twins put cars or little men or crackers  in my drink, like it’s anything new. Over and over. Because they think it’s hilarious. I was SO annoyed when the older 2 kept asking me where stuff was so they could go sled riding for a little while. I was LIVID when Bane ate my boot. I picked a fight with my husband while I folded ...

January 4, 2018.... Let that sink in a bit. 2018. (I don't feel like I'm old enough to be 34; I still feel like it's 2001.) According my WTForecast app, it is currently 13* outside, but feels like -4*. Tomorrow is looking to be even colder, and schools are already canceling. Our kids had a delay for the cold yesterday, so I'm anxious to see if they will delay again tomorrow. A lot of area schools have canceled school and any extra-curricular activities until Monday. And not because of snow. But, because of cold. the COLD! This is crazy! I don't remember it being this way when I was young, but then again, we also had it easy and didn't have to walk uphill in feet of snow with no shoes on. 😏 I noticed it had been a good month since I last posted. I knew it had been a while, but didn't realize it was a whole month. I don't know how some people blog, or vlog, so frequently. I feel like I would have to have my camera or app open at all times to make sure I...

I can't believe it's November 30th. Tomorrow is December 1st! (Happy Birthday, Carmen!) December. And in a month from now, we will be moving into 2018!!!!! I know the saying is that Time is fleeting, but honestly, as I get older, and the kids are growing, it really does go fast. It's crazy how some days seem like they drag, like they will never end, like bedtime can't come soon enough, yet here we are. November 30th, 2017. I still feel like I'm in my 20s. To think that I have 5 kids, and that my oldest is now THIRTEEN.... it's mind boggling. Anyway.... Here is sit, on November 30th, at 8:30 at night, in silence. Sweet, sweet silence. Big Bang Theory is on, the Christmas Tree is lit, and I am scarfing Mom's pumpkin roll like it's going to turn bad in 30 seconds. Ryan and Braxton are at Dryden's first basketball game of the season (edited: they won 19-18! WOOOO!), and the babies are sleeping soundly. *Sigh* These moments are few and far between. Inse...

5:30a.m. Cue Loud Mouth Larry. Every. Effing. Morning. When will this kid learn to love sleep like the rest of us? And when I say "Why is Everyone Screaming", it's mainly because of him. As soon as he wakes up. Why does my household ALLLL have to be awake and romping around by 6:30? I don't even set an alarm to wake up in the mornings anymore, because I know that Magnus' loud mouth will be the alarm. He is NEVER quiet. He stands at the gate outside of their door and yells... "MOMMY! MOMMY! I. WANT. OUT!" And it's always in his deep smoker voice. "SHEAMUTH WAKE UP!!!!!" Poor Sheamus. He never gets to sleep in, even if he wants to. Ideally, we would go in the living room, put on cartoons and snuggle. But Noooooo... someone has to get into EVERYTHING, climb on tables, yell for MILK!!!! I so badly want to wake him up around 10:00p and ask for things and scream. But then he would think it was play time and want to stay up. And there'...

What is it about Mom and Dad's bed that makes it so appealing? At one point this morning, I had 4/5 of the kids in our bed, all before 7:30. If Dryden had been at the house, I know he would've snuck his way in too. ❤️ I remember when I was little,   We were only allowed to lay in our parents bed on Saturday mornings to watch cartoons, specifically, PeeWee Herman. LOL. But any other time, we were not allowed in their room, bed, nothing. I understand that it is a habit that you don't want to start, knowing first hand how hard it was getting my oldest out of my bed once I got married. But Braxton and the babies LOVE laying in our bed, even if its just to lay and watch those God awful videos on YouTube. Braxton has finally broken the habit of wanting to sleep with us every night, and will only sneak in every once in a while. The babies have NEVER been allowed in bed with us, unless its under dire circumstances like the other one is sick or something. But its like once its...

I hate waiting so long in between posts. I feel like I miss so many funny stories. I try to write them down but Its hard. Right now, Magnus and I are snuggled on the couch while  Sheamus stands on the back of the reclined recliner, in just a T-shirt and undies, screaming and pounding on his chest. Saying how “ginat” he is. Yep, this thing is going down. Or someone is going to break a bone. At least the chair cushions the fall?🤷🏻‍♀️  Dryden’s Birthday was Saturday. It was one of the most low key, chill birthdays we have had. He had a friend over for a sleepover, and they were angels. Of course, all hell breaks loose between Logan and Dryden 20 minutes BEFORE his friend is due to leave. Name calling, wrestling and choke holds. So stupid. Over a T shirt. Because that’s what matters in an almost 13 year olds eyes. Uhhhh..... 🤔 We are in between sports, and crafting isn’t crazy right now, so I’m actually enjoying relaxing on the couch and growing this impressive Mom Belly. I. Ca...

Yea...it’s been one of those days....  The kind of day where you feel like the smallest things are ticking away at you, and you are one more “Sarah/Mom/Babe” away from completely melting into the floor. And to top it off, there’s a status going around FB, promoting awareness (in light of this whole Harvey Weinstein bullshit) to sexual harassment/misconduct/assault in women. Women who aren’t actresses, but every day people. It’s eye opening. And painful. No matter if it was something said inappropriately, or the full enchilada of assault/molestation/rape, it’s crazy to think of how many endured and overcame it. It’s heart warming to know you aren’t alone, in whatever aspect it was, but sad at the same time, to think that this is something we have all had to get over. Fuck those people who have made us feel any type of way other than happy. In the words of Celia Rae Foote, “ You know what I’d do if I were you? I’d give it right back to him. I’d hit him over the head with a skillet an...